Words of REST

Let Evening Come

Let the light of late afternoon

shine through chinks in the barn, moving

up the bales as the sun moves down.

Let the cricket take up chafing

as a woman takes up her needles

and her yarn. Let evening come.

Let dew collect on the hoe abandoned
in long grass. Let the stars appear

and the moon disclose her silver horn.

Let the fox go back to its sandy den.

Let the wind die down. Let the shed

go black inside. Let evening come.

To the bottle in the ditch, to the scoop

in the oats, to air in the lung

let evening come.

Let it come, as it will, and don't

be afraid. God does not leave us

comfortless, so let evening come.

by Jane Kenyon

The Tree of Contemplative Practices

I'm not sure how much of this you can actually read (since I had to shrink it to fit on my blog) but alas here is the very cool Tree of Contemplative Practices(from The Center for Contemplative Mind in Society):

Progressive Christianity

Humans love to categorize. We love to label, name and segment.

And while I wish not to box myself in and say "I am THIS," I think I have found a group of people that share a lot of the same philosophies and worldviews as myself. The name of this is Progressive Christianity. Here are the "8 Points" from the Center for Progressive Christianity's website:

...

By calling ourselves progressive,

we mean that we are Christians who:

1. Have found an approach to God through the life and teachings of Jesus;

2. Recognize the faithfulness of other people who have other names for the way to God's realm, and acknowledge that their ways are true for them, as our ways are true for us;

3. Understand the sharing of bread and wine in Jesus's name to be a representation of an ancient vision of God's feast for all peoples; (Trev's note: I'm not sure I totally get what what this means, exactly ... will have to investigate)

4. Invite all people to participate in our community and worship life without insisting that they become like us in order to be acceptable (including but not limited to):

• believers and agnostics, conventional Christians and questioning skeptics, women and men, those of all sexual orientations and gender identities, those of all races and cultures, those of all classes and abilities, those who hope for a better world and those who have lost hope;

5. Know that the way we behave toward one another and toward other people is the fullest expression of what we believe;

6. Find more grace in the search for understanding than we do in dogmatic certainty - more value in questioning than in absolutes;

7. Form ourselves into communities dedicated to equipping one another for the work we feel called to do: striving for peace and justice among all people, protecting and restoring the integrity of all God's creation, and bringing hope to those Jesus called the least of his sisters and brothers; and

8. Recognize that being followers of Jesus is costly, and entails selfless love, conscientious resistance to evil, and renunciation of privilege.

I have found much truth in my investigations of Truth from around the world. And while I respect and can completely understand why someone would choose to exclusively follow the way of Krishna, the Buddha, Rama, Allah or the myriad of other spiritual leaders, teachers and gurus, I choose to know and follow Yeshua (Jesus) as my gateway to "the Father." I love that his spiritual life was both esoteric and exoteric - the inner world of consciousness and spirit and the outer world of love and service. I will continue to learn and explore the ways that others touch and know the Infinite Mind - the Ground of Being - but always know that I have this home base to which I can always return.

---

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."
(Yeshua/Jesus)

The Slumbering Christ

"Deep within us all there is an amazing inner sanctuary of the soul, a holy place, a Divine Center, a speaking Voice, to which we may continually return. Eternity is at our hearts, pressing upon our time-torn lives, warming us with intimations of an astounding destiny, calling us home unto Itself. Yielding to these persuasions, gladly committing ourselves in body and soul, utterly and completely, to the Light Within, is the beginning of true life. It is a dynamic center, a creative Life that presses to birth within us. It is a Light Within that illumines the face of God and casts new shadows and new glories upon the human face. It is a seed stirring to life if we do not choke it. It is the Shekinah of the soul, the Presence in the midst. Here is the Slumbering Christ, stirring to be awakened, to become the soul we clothe in earthly form and action. And He is within us all."

an excerpt from The Light Within: A Testament of Devotion by Thomas Kelly

Reprogramming

At the beginning of Lent, I decided to forego reading any spiritual books because I felt that I had become too dependent on them and was too busy reading about Truth instead of actually experiencing it.

As it turns out, it's not that simple.

I've broken the book-fast completely. See, what I discovered is that through my spiritual reading (Jnana Yoga or Svadhyaya), I was in a sense reprogramming my mind. You can liken it to two different practices: meditation and mantra. In both practices you replace your habitual mind patterns (such as anxiety, fear, and restlessness) with other material (nothingness in the case of meditation, a repetative word or prayer in the case of mantra). While reading books and texts, my mind goes into "receive" mode (which in turn leaves a residue throughout the remainder of my day) instead of regurgitating its usual toxic gunk.

What I've learned through this fast, then, is that if I am reading a book or scripture about Loving God, I in fact do actualize that practice. If I'm reading about finding Peace within, it encourages me to live from that place of Peace as I drive or work or wash the dishes.

Someday I'll move beyond this and won't need to keep reprogramming myself. In the meantime, I've got a lot of old conditioning and old mental programming to overwrite and I'm quite "OK" with that. It's all one step at a time. This just happens to be the step I'm on.

The Path to Life

"Enter through the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to death, and there are many who enter through it. But the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it."
(Matthew 7:13-14)

Yes! Seek the path to life - to full living! Who says that these words of Jesus have to do with heaven and hell (as is usually interpreted)? Rather, this is an invitation to fling wide the gates of eternity here and in this moment.

Every day it is our choice which iron turnstile to push open.

Which path do I choose to walk today?

Dark Night of the Soul

Open the register, it's time to vent.

My absenteeism in the blogging-arena as of late is due to a tizzy I've found myself in over the past week and a half. I've been stuck in self-loathing, depressed, egoic me. I realize that this weight that has been baring down on me goes against everything I believe and know to be true about life, reality and spirituality - but it's almost as though I cannot help myself.

In particular, at work I feel like I am in a boxing ring and have been backed into the corner - helpless. Above me stands my large foe, pounding me - one blow after another - until I have crumbled into the mat. I feel trapped and on the defensive.

3 out of 4 of the days that I came into work this week thus far there have been emails, phone calls, or notes on my desk explaining how I could've done my job better in the previous week. Now, I work in a church - I help design the worship services among other things. And, can you imagine it, all 600 people want different things from me. Now, to many people in my position, they'd just say "to hell with the naysayers, I'm sticking to my guns." But I am strongly wired as a people-pleaser and hate to disappoint and cause pain to others. It just goes against my grain.

So I begin asking myself - do I want a different job? One that's less toxic to my (apparently) over-sensitive personality? Then I weigh options, question myself, stew, ask myself questions, work myself up, get stressed out, pout, gripe that things should be different, browse the internet for job opportunities, piss and moan, wonder about what my life means, and inwardly make things to be a much bigger deal than what they are. In short, I'm way over-analytical.

My monkey-mind needs a saddle and some reigns on it.

And all this time trying to figure out the meaning of my life and this, that and the other, I'm missing out on living. I'm missing on the opportunity to make the most of every opportunity. I'm missing the chance to MAKE MY REALITY what I want it to be. I guess it's like Tolle says in "The Power of Now" - you have 2 options: accept the situation or change it. This inner-resistance, this pissing and moaning is literal insanity. It gets you nowhere. You end up spinning in circles.

I suppose I'm learning how much INTERNAL work I have yet to do.

"Will I ever get to where it is that I am going?
Will I ever follow through with what I have planned?
I guess it's possible that I have been a bit distracted.
And the directions for me are a lot less in demand.

Will I ever get to where I'm going?
If I do will I know when I'm there?
If the wind blew me in the right direction
Would I even care?

I take a look around it's evident the scene has changed.
And there are times when I feel improved upon the past.
And there are times when I can't seem to understand at all.
And yes it seems as though I'm going nowhere really fucking fast."

(from "Nowhere Fast" by Incubus)

How Now Broken Vow

I breached my Spiritual Books fast today. When I got home from work, I felt uber-shitty. I felt separate and disconnected. I was angry at a few people and a couple of situations. I felt negatively influenced by outside forces.

So I sought solace in one of my favorite places: a book. And it turned out to be exactly what I needed to hear. I will return to the fast tomorrow. But today I have been blessed by the words of a saint.

Read this, memorize this, tattoo it on your forehead. I present to you the Buddha's teaching on love (the Metta Sutta):

He or she who wants to attain peace should practice being upright, humble, and capable of using loving speech. He or she will know how to live simply and happily, with senses calmed, without being covetous and carried away by the emotions of the majority. Let him or her not do anything that will be disapproved of by the wise ones.

And this is what he or she contemplates:

"May everyone be happy and safe, and may their hearts be filled with joy.

"May all living beings live in security and peace- beings who are frail or strong, tall or short, big or small, visible or not visible, near or far away, already born or yet to be born. May all of them dwell in perfect tranquility.

"Let no one do harm to anyone. Let no one put the life of anyone in danger. Let no one, out of anger or ill will, wish anyone any harm.

"Just as a mother loves and protects her only child at the risk of her own life, we should cultivate boundless love to offer to all living beings in the entire cosmos. We should let our boundless love pervade the whole universe, above, below and across. Our love will know no obstacles, our heart will be absolutely free from hatred and enmity. Whether standing or walking, sitting or lying, as long as we are awake, we should maintain this mindfulness of love in our own heart. This is the noblest way of living.

"Free from wrong views, greed and sensual desires, living in beauty and realizing perfect understanding, those who practice boundless love will certainly transcend birth and death."

(translation/interpretation by Thich Naht Hanh, emphasis mine)

I (Heart) Huckabees

The new film "I (Heart) Huckabees" is Trev Diesel's newest pick for movie of the decade. The movie was just released on DVD this week and I found it to be the most hilarious and enlightening movie to come out in a long time.

Don't let me fool you, though. The movie is not for everyone as it does, as Roger Ebert put it, "leave the viewer out of the loop." If you're unfamliar with existentialism, the inter-connectedness of the universe, quantum particles, envrionmental issues and/or meditation/deconstruction this movie may make you chuckle at times, but will most likely leave you wondering what all the hype is about.

It also has the most hilarious few minutes of comedy I've ever seen: the lead characters sitting around the dinner table, discussing existential philosphy with a group of subburban conservative Christians. ("We don't have to ask those questions, do we mom?")

Genious script. Genious dialogue. The perfect movie for people who can't help but ask the big questions and don't mind laughing at themselves for it.

Ecoliving

Who'd have thought - here in little 'ol Indiana - we'd have one of the world's most innovative communities.

This place is freaking sweet. Coffee Creek Center. Here are a few bits of cool info from their website:

• Streets and buildings designed for pedestrians make walking enjoyable, while bicycle routes are an integral part of street and landscape design.
• Coffee Creek Center seeks to reverse the trend towards sprawl by concentrating development to create vital population density, and sets aside high quality natural area as community resources.
• Buildings at Coffee Creek Center use advanced materials, equipment, orientation, daylighting design and energy analysis techniques to minimize the use of energy.
• Building to minimize the use of non-renewable resources, encourage reuse and recycling of materials and use sustainably-harvested materials wherever practical.
• Unbuilt areas are being restored to a pre-settlement landscape to minimize soil erosion and rebuild soil integrity, re-establish native plant and animal communities and encourage increased biological diversity.

My God! It sounds like heaven! I've gotta go check this place out.

"How strange we should be here at all."

• "Just to be is a blessing. Just to live is holy." (Rabbi Heschel)
• "The privledge of a lifetime is being who you are." (Joseph Campbell)
• "People usually consider walking on water or in thin air a miracle. But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air, but to walk on earth. Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don't even recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child - our own two eyes. " (Thich Naht Hanh)
• "How strange we should be here at all." (from "Freak Out" by 311)

When negativity creeps into my life, I try to remember one of these quotes. Indeed, the miracle is life itself. Just being alive is enough to blow your mind if you really consider it. Perhaps this is why Jesus chose not to entertain people's requests to produce miracles - if you come to expect the extraordinary, you'll never tune in to see the wonder and awe in the ordinary.

Yogi Skywalker and Yoda-ji

In college, I had a ritual of popping in one of the Star Wars trilogy VHS tapes every Friday afternoon and cleaning my room. Since I had to clean house this afternoon, I went ahead and put in my favorite of the three: The Empire Strikes Back.

I hadn't seen the film in a few years and am definately in a different place now than I was back in college. I knew, of course, that Yoda was the old, wise Guru but never really thought much about what he was communicating. Today was different though - for the first time I really observed the teacher/disciple relationship and the Wisdom he was imparting (not to mention the course in Hatha Yoga - see picture!!!).

I found this following quote very interesting and profound. Who says pop culture doesn't have anything good to offer?

YODA: A Jedi's strength flows from the Force. But beware of the dark side. Anger... fear... aggression. The dark side of the Force are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight. If once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will, as it did Obi-Wan's apprentice.

LUKE: Vader. Is the dark side stronger?

YODA: No...no...no. Quicker, easier, more seductive.

LUKE: But how am I to know the good side from the bad?

YODA: You will know. When you are calm, at peace. Passive. A Jedi uses the Force for knowledge and defense, never for attack.

LUKE: But tell me why I can't...

YODA: (interrupting) No, no, there is no why. Nothing more will I teach you today. Clear your mind of questions.

After dropping my wife off at her workplace this morning, I began the 15-minute commute from her work to mine. To fill that time appropriately, I turned off the radio and began using my wrist mala. As I let the mantra "Om Mani Padme Hum" (which means, loosely, that God is like a precious jewel located in my heart) resonate repetitively I began to think about how - not only is God in the lotus of my heart - but God is within every person in existence. As I passed cars or pedestrians, I would imagine God sitting at their core.

That was until I pulled behind the red car.

On this car's back window was a sticker that said "Marriage=Man+Woman." Now, I'm fine if you want to hold that view, but it seemed very closed-minded and arrogant to make it into a bumper sticker and place it on your car. The minute my eyes hit this sticker, my lips proclaimed: "Jackass."

Hahaha. Here I was, repeating an ancient prayer about God in all beings and the minute I see someone I disagree with, I curse him like he's the scum of the earth. I didn't take it too seriously though - in fact I laughed at the irony of the situation.

And then all of a sudden understanding settled in - for I realized that within the driver was the essence of God too - and that given the same conditioning, environment he was raised in, and the circumstances in which he finds himself, I would probably be just like him and behave in the same way.

And in the giant scheme of things - the great Cosmic Drama - this man's "apparent ignorance" helped teach me something today.

So, there are either accidents or there are not.

God in the Marketplace

Before the book fast, I was reading "Paths to God" by Ram Das - a book of reflections on the Bhagavad-Gita. In chapter 3, Ram Das speaks exclusively of Karma Yoga - the path to God through action/work. The entire chapter is perhaps best summed up by the following sentence:

"So the karma yogi is the person who uses his or her life to come to God by listening for the dharmic act, acting without attachment to the outcome, all the while knowing she or he's not the actor, anyway."

This is indeed the formula for turning the home and the workplace into a spiritual practice.

The goal is therefore not to find a "more spiritual" job (like, in my case wanting to teach hatha yoga full time) but to bring spirit into the very "ordinary" work and homelife. In something as simple as a routine daily task at work, can I listen to Divine Order for instruction, act without anxiety, selfish motives or other expectations, and release any sense of ego "me-ness" in the action? If so, I have found a path to God. If not, it will not be found in a "more spiritual" profession either.

The Paradoxical "Softer Side" of Diesel

Due to my wife's constant commenting on how I take myself too seriously, I have decided to create a supplemental blog entitled "...on the other hand." I will continue to use this blog (The Sound of Diesel Musing) to share thoughts and reflections on spirituality, sadhana, and yoga. But if you're looking for some "light reading" and aren't afraid of being offended by the more darkly humorous side of my life, then check out "...on the other hand."

And if you don't think humor has a place in the life of of a sadhak or yogi, see the stories of Krshna's playfulness, Hanuman teasing the saints in the forest, or just open your eyes to the comedy of God that is all around and within us. Cheerio!